Dilemma kehidupan yang tipikal.duit.
dengan ini, aku isytiharkan,aku muflis.harharhar.
oh oh.yer.i won't be receiving any cash until february 2009.isk
p/s=lain kali jangan duduk chestnut.padan muke.


I had an illness today.
my body's temperature kept rising
and rising
and rising
i looked out the window
its still bright like a dimmed willow
i kept holding on to myself
am i infected or deteriorated
by a subconscious mind outdated
from time being im fading away
so stop the lash that hurts within
my heart which are telling me
the truth of the lies foresee

im missing mommy already
im missing friendzy already
im kicking my head already
to shoot my brain off the sky
to say from whom im not the knot
knock me up like u said inside
im willing to say that im not
ill say that i cannot
to push myself further for one more time

hey stop looking back
above the shoulder of your guts
all the dreams are shattered on the sky
its not your fault or mine
its just the time that kept it right
to be the way it is for sure
but u can change it if u want
for i know that u'll say not
so stop bringing yourself down
and start seeding your lawn
to make it grow like u want
so that u can reach the sky
up above so high

i want to go home
the way i came from
the way i marched
the route i crunched
as i said that i was the one
to do things so right
choosing the needs over the wants
and u better stop the grunts
cuz i know this is the night
that pulls the trigger of the might
and i shall see the light
that came from the brightside

i never want to come here
but i dont want to stay back
to cry for freedom of the lack
of my unconcsious self inside
that says, "hey dont u lie"

i miss my family so bad.the end

stop comparing! ..and copying!

hey how come he does this better? hey how come he did it that way? hey how bla bla bla and the bla.what the hell.comparing is not a need.its certainly not a deed.its a tragedy.its a retarded way of thinking normally.in other words, its useless.u might want a little bit of comparing when it comes to making deeds and avoiding sins.but what about behaviour?thats my problem.i tend to compare the nature or the ability of others with mine.ohh, the math thingy should be done in this way.ohh, the notes should be done in capital letters.aaaa?

now now, open your mind, free your thoughts and use your brain.life is not about getting straight a's all the time or pushing towards limits or catching stars above the sky.its about putting effort for later comfort.well, most of the times, i used to tell myself that i need to get this result and that result so that i can bla2 and here comes the big part.being pissed off when your xm result or any result turned out bad.in that case, why dont you use your own way and pissed off at your own way.well thats another problem.i tend to follow the 'way' which i thought was right - which was the 'way' that i saw others was doing.well, dif people hav diff path and diff method.thats for sure.and surely, at the bottom of em all, its not about the result, its about what you did to get the result, its about the effort that you put to get that result, its about making your dream alive without even dreaming about it, its about pushing beyond limits without even knowing the limitations.

ahhh..ive always wanted say that.haha.oh yea.there's some photos which ive taken for granted.lol.whats that suppose to mean.

ahha.its an oldskool main gate of my campus.
well, the campus IS really old.

my own u of t notebook.huahua

waitin for iftar and praying for a
chicken bbq for iftar.wakaka


I think i kinda want to de'formal'ized my bloggin style. after readin back some of my posts, somehow i just felt like reading an assignment essay. haha. maybe its just a thought though. oh yea, there's a party goin on downstairs. haha. happy iftar guys =)

Its a manhattan stromboli. and its halal =)

Is it true that friendship has no expiry date?

regarding to the topic above, which is a statement that was said by a good friend of mine, it keeps my brain ticking and trying to get an inside-out thoughts of it. Is it true that friendship has no expiry date unlike a fresh milk?pepperoni pizza?fried rice? Well, personally i think that many people will walk in and out of our lives; but only true friends will leave footprints in our hearts. but what i really just discovered about friendship, which is really interesting, is that friendship can grow separately..without growing apart. means that we can go on our own way, but the bonds that we had created throughout our friendship, it will never eventually break off.


The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said : A man is upon the religion of his friend, and there is no good in friendship with one who does not see for you what he sees for himself.
(Ibn Adi)

Religion also agrees with the need of friendship that has no expiry date at all. because friends are those who remind us and its like havin an awareness-detector by your side. isnt that awesome? the role of friendship doesnt just stick with hanging out and watchin movies together, its about reminding ourselves to behave better and just for the sake of being a better ummah.


I really love my friends, seriously, i really do. the one that God made me to stick with. its all just about appreciating what God has gave upon us. and for me, i dont kick friends that i hate, i keep them. because people that i hate is actually the people that always reminds me not to backstab people, not to backbite people, not to neglect our daily prayers. and therefore, never i had the feeling of hate towards those people that i just called "friends that i hate", instead, they are the people who keeps reminding me everyday just in case i forgot.


I believe that friendship lasts eternally, it never ends if u just believe the power of friendship. Even our prophet (PBUH) keeps his friends and care for them as if they were his own family member. thats why i tried to keep my friends as if they were my brothers and sisters. thats why i said that friendship has no expiry date.

credit to milan who torn my brain apart with inspiration.

Beyond good and evil

I remembered one day that a friend of mine told me that life was never fair. Its cruel. Its sucks. Well, the truth is, life does not suck. Really. its not that i never sucked at my life but its just that there are more things that you just cant see which is the 'hikmah'. and by the way, seeing is believing right? patience is just all that needed to make that thing come right in front of your eyes.

I treasured my life so much just to seek the goodness of everything thats evil and evilness in everything thats good. Because we dont judge a book by its cover. therefore, i dont judge a person by its face. I judge them by their soul. well, to be exact, their behaviour. and in encountering 'situations', i use the same methodology. They say that everything we see arent really what its look like.

For those who dont know, i missed my flight on the 29th of aug. well, i dont really 'missed' the flight but somebody made me missed the flight. but thats ok. nobodys really perfect. but the things is that, its God who made me missed the flight, thats for sure. There's something good beyond this situation which i called 'evil' before. life isnt sucks, its just that ur not good enough to make it better. life isnt cruel, its just that ur not good enough to make it pleasant.

One last ramadhan before my hijr really rocks. Well, kitchen was really full of great cuisine when its iftar, of course. and it wud probably be my last ramadhan wif family for the next 4 years to come. oh yea, friends of subang just move in to their bungalow(which they rent) and it really rocks. damn its beautiful. big like hell. i never knew students cud afford a house like that. i sleptover for a night in fitra's room.

I thought about being the unluckiest person in this world for that very incident, but then again, i just knew that i was the luckiest person ever to have such opportunities to spend time with the people that i love for one more day. thank you, God.