Getting off the couch

I've had a great, sweet, miserable, terrific, horrific, good, bad, whimsical, enchanted 3 months holiday. And not a second have i been feelin regretful or whatsoever as the time has come to an end and surely, its the end where it all begins. Undergraduate college life is up ahead where curiosity and mind games are built at this very moment. packing? not finished.eating?over finished. ramadhan? yea its coming. studyhardsuperloadextraassignmentsupersleepkill? dammit i knew i saw it coming.haha.

Changes are important and pertinent in every step of life towards dunya's success and even jannah. And for this hijr, my intention is towards the almighty God and hopefully, success alloveragain.therefore, the time to change has come. Ill call this part of life as 'the awakening'. yea u know..the part where changes are made.the part where i wanna get closer to perfection in the eyes of God, of course.the part where i wanna sacrifice my bla3. yea life is all about getting better. maybe ill go start packing and reminiscing my last few hours of my time here while thinking about a better tommorow.Later!

And the swiping continues..

i swiped. he swiped. they swiped. its easy to say when things that you bought get swiped by your parents.i intended not to do this but it was my guts that caught me off guard.i have my own cash yet i delivered a false message to my soul - use your guardians. that was bad. that was something that i shall avoid. yet i still have temptation on doing it again. some people would say that these are normal situation for students like me. i aint gonna deny that cause its true. but you know what, i shall forbid myself in depending on my guardians. well, depends on how i define 'forbid'.haha.

If patience is a virtue, why does it hurts so much?

Patience is moderated by feelings that we cultivate during emotion contact between people. I believe that people that fail to control their emotion are caused by their lackness to apply patience as a virtue inside their soul. Well, i'm just trying to throw out a point here whereby my patience is no longer valid. I'm struggling to fit myself into a world where boundaries are no longer exist.

Emotion is hypothetical. Patience aren't. It is not a burden for men to carry emotion and patience. but it is their duty to balance emotion and patience. I felt one thing when it comes patience in daily life; "why is it always me?". This question arises multiple times and ive had it. I want solution. I want freedom of mind. so, tell me, why does it hurts so much?

I see people raging on this very earth because of their patience that dried out. I see mobsters shooting victims of tragedy because of emotion. So does these two things get connected? Well, personally, it does. seriously, i was so naive back then, i didnt even know the importance of emotion control to gain patience.