Last week, i attended an usrah and we discussed about a subject that just knock my head with a big hammer of doom which pops into my mind how intentions, or nawaitu has a big meaning in me.
Just speak about intentions. it sounds too general, plain, untouchable, soft, typical. but try to search deeper. what's life has anything to do with our nawaitu? The quest of knowledge starts from a single step that marks the note of intention. The strange-wilderness of this place that i am rushing through is like neverending.oh university life.boredom starts to rise from time to time.giving up is an option.and looking back was the best thing to do.but then, a reflection of my mentor knocks the door of my beneath as i startled about one thing that he told me, The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said: “The reward of deeds depend upon the intentions, and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended.” - 'Umar bin Al-Khattab, Vol. 8, Book 78, Number 680. it was all a big mistake! i was there and the winning prize was there all along! its just that my heart was sealed with a big poison of lust with the speech of the devil. i never realized that my intention was torn apart between my dreams all along. this is not the path that i want. its not my intention to be here to enjoy. its not my intention to be here to sit down and sleep all the way downtown. i am here to justify the truth. i am here to be a seeker of knowledge.
To defeat your enemy, is to know your enemy. imagine the obstacles itself. tight lectures,difficult tests,time constraints,friends,families,homesick.ugh.i would puke everything out if wanted to.in any perspective that i have observed in the magnificent timeline of the next 4 years, i just wanted to see a light. a direction of God. I set my nawaitu straight. seriously. I put my past behind my back as i carve my path to seek knowledge. I want barakah from Him. I want my effort to be rewarded with something that anyone couldnt have imagined. But then, my self-inside asked me a brilliant question. You sure that you deserve it?
6 comments:
"maka Allah mengilhamkan kepada jiwa itu (jalan) kefasikan dan ketaqwaan, (QS. 91:8)
# sesungguhnya beruntunglah orang yang mensucikan jiwa itu, (QS. 91:9)
# dan sesungguhnya merugilah orang yang mengotorinya. (QS. 91:10)
(As-Shams:8-10)
know what?other than different experience u guys, overseas student would obtained, u guys would also have this amazing how can i say it awareness that made me feel like i wanted to study abroad and see myself from there.but it's too late now.u're very lucky and don't ever take it for granted!
thanx.but i think its never too late.there's still postgrad oversea study.heheh
aku nk kawen dh kot time tu ;p anyhow..share la ape yg ko dgr kat usrah tu kat sini..i dont know why,kat ukm ni fakulti pengajian islam bkn main bsr tp until now aku xpnah nmpk pn org buat usrah..tp kalo ade mcm la aku pegi kan?but still,keep on writing..aku ske bace..and insaf jgk sket..hehe
intention? hoho... what r u intends there actually? sigh*
haha.what do you mean by the *sigh.
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